Intuition

Fucking intuition. Guilt for wanting to listen to it, regret and stupidity when we don’t. What is it  that makes us doubt what we feel in our body and soul? How would life be different if we let intuition be the radar ? The heartache that could be spared, the time that would not be … More Intuition

Warm cherry wood

August 22nd…. The night was filled with fun. Dinner, a concert and lovemaking. Although I had known for months something was wrong I had yet to be able to figure out exactly what it was. I woke as usual and got everyone breakfast. I ushered my then husband to the door, kissed him and wished … More Warm cherry wood

Wet

It was a cool night in Oregon, rain was flowing hard and evenly as is a familiar Oregon sound.  We arrived at my apartment. It was a very cute little place overlooking a little pond in Beaverton. The rain made us sprint from the car to the door where there was an overhang. When we … More Wet

Dear Judge

Dear Judge , Do you know who I am? Two aganozing years you have been in charge of my divorce, but you never once heard me speak.  We were in the same room three times but you avoided my eyes, you called my children by the wrong names and you displayed obvious disinterest. By way … More Dear Judge

Contemplation

What do you do with competing emotions. You feel anger, sadness and grief all rolled up into a tight little package, eating at your very core but your very being is gentle and kind, loving and joyful. Peace calls to you but just when you seem to find it that tight little package unwraps steals … More Contemplation

Unseen

As we walk through life going from job, to store to home and back again, no one really knows what we are feeling, what has occurred in our lives.  People are kind and polite but for the most part do not have a desire to hear what emotions are hidden beneath the “I’m good, how … More Unseen

No justice

Frustration, at the height of all the emotions I have right now frustration is what I feel the most. Between the loss of a husband (albeit a crappy one) and the distorted legal system I am having trouble keeping up with it all. Since when did it become OK to never pay your taxes? Since … More No justice

Approaching the end

It is a cold and almost snowy day here in upstate New York. Yesterday is was 50 degrees with rain – today a whisper of snow flakes are falling through the air. The dust is settling in my life  and my emotions are wild, like a fire being fanned by the wind roaring up and … More Approaching the end